Dawn of Darkness

It was 1981. July. The first indications of what was to come began to appear. Eight young gay men had died, all exhibiting signs of having a malignant form of a cancer previously only seen in very old Italian men. The lesions were due to Kaposi Sarcoma. There was also a drastic increase in cases of the rare Pneumocystis carinii pneumonia (PCP) in both California and New York.

This was the dawn of AIDS. But unlike the rising of the sun, this signaled a darkness that still hangs over this nation and the world like a heavy cloak. Death’s black cape.

I remember I was on summer break during High School when the first reports began to trickle in. There was no information, but they were all certain that this was a gay cancer. Nobody else need worry. As a young man still questioning his sexuality - though knowing in my heart the answer full well - this news terrified me. I had no idea that the proverbial shit was about to hit the fan.

The news erupted from every pulpit like a volcano. Ignorance fueled fear, fear begat anger, arrogance begat condemnation and damnation. Anger became hatred became verbal and physical attacks on the entire gay community. Religion had found it's holy sword and would help God wipe every faggot off the face of the earth with glee.

Vesuvius could not have destroyed as many lives as the Christians did. They didn't turn the other cheek - they turned their backs. They did not show the compassion of Christ, they drove us out like lepers on the streets of Nazareth. Not a one called for reason to prevail, or for hearts to open up to those who were suffering.

They made a bad situation much worse.

Gays were hunted down like wolves, blamed for all that was wrong in America. This disease was "God's punishment" for the sins against nature, a statement affirmed by then-President Ronald Reagan. Thank you, Bonzo, for your rational assessment of a health crisis. People were dying and there was celebrations in the churches, pleased with what was happening to the 'homosexuals.'

Even though I didn't yet identify as gay, I saw no rational way that a cancer could target gay men unless being gay was genetic. What an outrageous contradiction for those who believe any disease could attach to a select group to turn around and say gay people "choose" the lifestyle. I knew in my heart that one day the proof would appear. It would begin to show up in the non-gays, too. Then the hate would disappear and compassion would return.

I thought too soon. In 1982, after "gay cancer" and "gay plague" segued to GRID and then AIDS, a classmate of mine came to school wearing a t-shirt dripping with hate. The image burned itself into my memories so deeply that I have forgotten the face of the guy who wore it. Emblazoned on the front was a log reminiscent of the old RAID bug spray. Only it didn't say RAID, it read AIDS. And the catchy slogan was replaced with one far more repulsive: "Kills fags dead!"

I felt like the roaches running away from the can in the commercials. But I couldn't run. I couldn't speak. I just stood there, closing my eyes wishing it would all go away. But while the shirt was gone when I reopened my eyes, the trail of laughter that followed it still rang in my ears. That people found the shirt amusing was as abhorrent as the shirt itself. That the school administrators didn't send the boy home with a suspension or even expulsion is beyond belief.

More people were dying, 'experts' were talking, but still no real facts. The only thing one could be sure of was that nothing was sure. Fear that close contact, drinking from the same glass, kissing - even sitting on a toilet seat or breathing the same air - could pass this disease on to another person continued to rise. People became afraid to touch because they might catch whatever this thing was. And touch is the most important thing to a person who is suffering from an unknown and untreatable ailment.

If the world sat in fear, how much more afraid were those who faced certain death? Or knew they would have to face it alone?

The silence was deafening. The roar of the mob mentality even more so.

Ignorance is Not Justice

When I read the news item below out of Dallas, it made me very angry. How is it that after 27 years of HIV/AIDS, ignorance is still so prevalent? That fear (which is the source of most ignorance) is allowed to drive people to make rash judgments.

Read the article for my factual argument below.

HIV-positive man sentenced 35 years for spitting at officer


Thu May 15, 6:32 AM ET

DALLAS - An HIV-positive man convicted of spitting into the eye and mouth of a Dallas police officer has been sentenced to 35 years in prison.

Because a jury found that Willie Campbell used his saliva as a deadly weapon, the 42-year-old will have to serve half his sentence before becoming eligible for parole. He was sentenced Wednesday.

Campbell was being arrested in May 2006 for public intoxication when he began resisting and kicking inside the patrol car, Dallas police office Dan Waller testified.

Campbell was convicted of harassment of a public servant.


It is a well-known fact that HIV is not transmitted by saliva. Thus, the officer's life or health were never in danger, thus Mr. Campbell's saliva was not "a deadly weapon."

Which body fluids transmit HIV?


These body fluids have been shown to contain high concentrations of HIV:

blood
semen
vaginal fluid
breast milk
other body fluids containing blood

The following are additional body fluids that may transmit the virus that health care workers may come into contact with:
fluid surrounding the brain and the spinal cord
fluid surrounding bone joints
fluid surrounding an unborn baby

HIV has been found in the saliva and tears of some persons living with HIV, but in very low quantities. It is important to understand that finding a small amount of HIV in a body fluid does not necessarily mean that HIV can be transmittedby that body fluid. HIV has not been recovered from the sweat of HIV-infected persons. Contact with saliva, tears, or sweat has never been shown to result in transmission of HIV.


I am going to try and get ACLU and other rights organizations to fight for Mr. Cambpell's sentence to reduced to jail time only for a month or two. Not this fear and ignorance-driven sentence. When people are put in prison for 40 years on murder charges, this is shameful and discriminatory.

I'm ashamed that this happened in my state. Or in my country. Almost three decades after this disease was discovered, and the pandemic of ignorance rages on.