Why Alphabet Soup Upsets My Stomach

As a gay man, I have found myself at odds with many in the community on how we as a whole label ourselves. To be honest, the current trend has me concerned that our efforts have become splintered and divisive at a time when we need unity more than ever before. The “alphabet soup” approach needs to be retired, and a single defining word which encompasses all aspects of the community must become commonplace.

A bit of my own history first. As I stated, I am gay. It took twenty-one years to accept that fact about myself. It was the summer of 1986, between my sophomore and junior years at Texas A&M. When I had arrived as an undergrad in the Fall of 1984, Gay Student Services Organization (GSSO) was still fighting the university in federal court to get official recognition as a student group. Despite not yet being “out,” I wrote letters supporting “them.” I was on campus - still in the closet - the day the Supreme Court chose to not hear A&M’s appeal of the Fifth Circuit Court’s ruling that they had to recognize GSSO.

So, back to Fall 1986. I joined the now-recognized Gay Student Services at the first meeting of the semester. Spring of 1987 I was elected Vice President, and became the de-facto President that summer. After I dropped out of college at the end of the Summer semester - facing the reality that I had been diagnosed with HIV - I left GSS, since I was no longer a student.

In 1989, a group of lesbians wanted to force the organization to change its name, from Gay Student Services to Gay & Lesbian Student Services (or GLaSS). Two former officers of GSSO and myself defended the original name of the group, as did a few gay women who found the term “lesbian” to be too militant. Ultimately, our side lost the vote, and the next month, none of the lesbians who had forced the change were there - and they never returned.

In 1997, Ellen Degeneres infamously came out on her sitcom, Ellen. She didn’t announce that she was a lesbian. She proudly stated (through the open microphone), “I’m gay.” Not, "I'm a lesbian." Gay. Most people, when coming out to friends or their parents, phrase it the same way, regardless of gender. It’s easier.

Jump forward to August 2000. After my thirteen year relationship ended with a crash, I decided it was time for me to do something for the gay community - something I’d been denied by my now ex. I set out to create an organization for queer faculty & staff at A&M. The name our committee came up with prior to the first formal meeting was Gay & Lesbian Professional Network. I wanted to avoid the mess that GSSO/GLaSS went through by being pro-active.

No such luck. At the first meeting there was a bisexual woman and a transgendered woman. Each insisted that their designation be included in the organization’s name. I’d thought ahead and made certain the it was in the bylaws, but that wasn’t enough for them. I pointed out how important it was that those outside our community - Texas A&M University being well-known as ultra-conservative -  know who we were, and that a lengthy name or acronyms would just confuse everybody. After much debate and giving the members a month to consider, the vote was to name the group GLBT Professional Network.

I’ve done a great deal of thinking since then. Is it a detriment to our community to put every possible letter of the alphabet into every organization’s name for people to feel included? How do we decide the order of the letters - which comes first, and should that honor rotate? As you add Intersexed, Queer, Questioning, Asexual, Pansexual, Non-Sexual, Xenosexual, Unisexual, and more to the soup, wouldn’t it soon be easier to include every letter - just to be safe?

How about that Sesame Street song? “Ab kadef gee jeckly mnop ker stu witsez”? I’m sure Bert & Ernie would love to sing it for us. I’d bet the Muppesexuals want to have their personal label in any organizations name, too. Would you risk angering Dr. Bunsen Honeydew and Beaker by ignoring their demands?

Or shall we just pick the letter of the week out of a bag of Scrabble tiles? Of course, how many would we need to pick to make everybody happy? I don’t think there’s enough letters in the alphabet to make everybody happy.

And when the words are shortened to just the first letter, how can anybody know what they stand for? Perhaps A is for A-sexual. Or maybe Andro-sexual. Could be Almost-sexual. How about Any-sexual? When only those on the inside know what the letters mean - and even then, not everybody in the community will be aware - it divides us, and thus weakens us and our voice.

Why Queer Queer Queer, QUEER is the Word

While gay may suffice for gay men and women, it doesn’t quite work for all aspects of our community. A transgender person may begin life as a gay man, but become a straight woman. Somebody born with indeterminate gender can still be straight, but still consider themselves outside the “norm”.

This is why I feel it’s time for us to embrace the queer.

Perhaps it’s best to start this discussion with the definition of the word.

strange or odd from a conventional viewpoint; unusually different; singular

The main reason many people in our community dislike the word queer is that first meaning. While I myself often embrace my strange sense of humor, and relish in being seen as odd by somebody that doesn’t know me (or even by those who do), I do understand how the word can still hurt. Any word, used to diminish another, causes pain to the one targeted. I know. I’ve suffered the slings and arrows of verbal name-calling myself - was called queer (among other things) in high school a number of times.

But as we age, we should learn how to turn the negatives that life (and people) throws at us and make them positives. Much like turning the pink triangle patch that homosexual men were forced to wear in the Nazi concentration camps into a symbol of our struggle. We remember the pain by claiming the mark as our own. A way to announce to the world, “Never again.”

Now on to the second definition. I can understand being different, but what makes it unusual? Look around you. Every person is unique. Now look in the mirror. Okay, not the best suggestion because you look exactly like your reflection - only reversed. But use that to see what makes you different, especially unusually so. Do you realize that  you aren’t seeing yourself as the world sees you? That the part in your hair appears to you to be on the right, but it’s actually on your left. Wow. That’s pretty unusual when you think about it.

As for singular, I’m going to defend this by showing my gayness. Why being singular is a wondrous thing. By using lyrics from a Broadway play. 'A Chorus Line,' to be exact.

One… singular sensation
Every little step he takes.
One… thrilling combination
Every move that he makes.
One smile and suddenly nobody else will do;
You know you'll never be lonely with you know who.
One… moment in his presence
And you can forget the rest.
For the guy is second best
To none,
Son.
Ooooh! Sigh! Give him your attention.
Do. I. Really have to mention?
He's the One!

There you have it. Queer embraces us all - not despite our unusual differences, or despite our singular-nes, or despite our strange and odd ways. Queer defines us because of these things. Queer brings us together, unites us, and strengthens us as a community. And that’s a good thing.

One last defense. The classic march chant. The one we say when “I’m mad and I’m not going to take it anymore” just doesn’t speak to us the right way.

“We’re here. We’re Queer. Get used to it.”

Or, in my opinion:

“We’re still here. We’re all Queer. You damn well better get used to it!”

We should not fear them, and if we are united in name, we become united in purpose, and the Power of Queer becomes invincible and unstoppable. And then they will fear us. We, the United Queers of America.

Especially when we don our gay apparel and it's not even a holiday.

The Ted Kennedy Health Care Plan

Hello all. Apologies for the extensive absence.

With all the misinformation flying around from the Republicans and the health “insurance” industry (AKA the American Mafia) about President Obama’s health care plan, I thought it was time to put more than two cents in.

Let’s make one thing clear first. If you (or someone you know) has cancer; heart disease; diabetes; HIV/AIDS; leukemia; Down’s Syndrome; Alzheimer’s; epilepsy; mental health problems; hepatitis; hemophilia; cirrhosis; are on dialysis; or any other illness, syndrome, infection, etc. then you have a pre-existing condition. Period.

Hell, life is a pre-existing condition. I’m surprised the insurance companies haven’t cashed in on this: they could deny everybody care with this simple truth. You are born, thus you get ill. If you were never born, this couldn’t have happened, right? Now, that doesn’t mean that the dead or the un-dead can get coverage; they, too, were at one point living. Not that I’ve ever seen a vampire in the emergency room because an amateur forgot which side the heart was on when they drove in the wooden stake.

But I digress.

If you, for some reason, lose your current health care coverage, your pre-existing conditions most likely will not be covered by your new insurance provider. Aside: why are they called “providers” when all too often they deprive? Chew on that for a bit - just don’t choke - may not be covered.

It is time to cut the health insurance companies out like a cancer. That’s the best analogy for them. They endanger the health - physical, mental, emotional and financial - of the people of this country. You could try radiation therapy, but I'm afraid they are as immune to this as cockroaches.

Every time they deny an expensive or experimental procedure, they put the burden on the patient. If you don’t have the money - having expected your health insurance to cover it - you either struggle to pay or default.

If you default, it sets off a chain of events. First, your credit rating plummets. This could affect getting loans, renting an apartment, buying a car or home. The negative credit will linger over your head and your life for seven years.

Second, the hospital and doctors will attempt collection. If that fails, it will be sent to an agency. You will get phone calls and letters pressuring you, sometimes in threatening terms, to pay your outstanding debt. Not great for your mental health.

Almost makes you wish you’d taken your chances by not having the procedure done, doesn’t it? Or at least saved your money by not handing it over to the insurance company. Like I said, the American Mafia. Pay up, and we’ll protect you. Can’t be responsible for what happens if you don’t. Capisce?

Canada, the United Kingdom, France, Norway, Spain - even Cuba - have national heath care. Despite the fear tactics being employed by those opposed to you being healthy, citizens of those nations are, for the most part, quite pleased with the system.

As for being socialized medicine, what’s wrong with that? According to the Declaration of Independence, “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable rights, that among these are life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.”

When you are sick, are you happy? I suppose finding a commode could be considered the pursuit of that status, but does it really seeking happiness, or merely relief? I guarantee those who have to put up with you aren’t overjoyed.

By the way, isn’t health an integral part of life? Oh, yes. I mentioned that above. Life is a pre-existing condition. Thus, it seems self-evident to me that all persons have a right to health care to preserve that life as best as possible. There is no guarantee that you will keep living forever - death is, eventually, a constant. But why die when it could be avoided with medical care? And why die because you couldn’t afford it.

How many rich people live longer lives because they have solid health insurance? Do they care if you, too, could live a better life? Of course not. Elitism includes access to the best care, while the huddled masses die in the streets like rats. Enough where they came from.

So why are you letting them tell you to reject Obama’s health care? Rush Limbaugh is eventually going to have a massive coronary due to his abundant size and drug abuse. You can be sure he has doctors and heart surgeons at his beck and call. Dick Cheney’s already proven that by having money - i.e., power - one gets what they need. Can you? You think? Really? Guess again.

As a point of fact, this country, the states, and cities have been playing “socialist” as far back as the late 19th century. Gasp! Horrors! Take a look at how socialism has infiltrated our nation long before there was Communism:

Public Education: Even those who don’t have children, or their kids are no longer in school, pay taxes to fund the school system. Not that education in America these days is on par with the rest of the civilized world. But imagine how many more stupid and ignorant people there would be if they couldn’t learn to read or write without having the financial ability. Can you say a thousand years of George W. Bush’s? I knew you could.

Emergency Services: would you prefer to have to pay for the police, fire department or paramedics to come to your rescue? Your tax dollars pay for those services, whether you need them or not. Of course, you better have good insurance, or you’ll be paying for that ambulance. And the EMT’s. And the Emergency Room visit...

Veteran’s Health Administration: This is socialized health care. Your esteemed (elite) Congress men and women, as well as the President and his cabinet, get the same type of health care. For the rest of their unnatural lives. No wonder they don’t want you to have it. As I mentioned, elitism. Aren’t you glad you paid for Dick Cheney’s pacemaker?

Transportation: Our highway and interstate infrastructure was paid for by - you guessed it - YOU. And me. And every other tax payer. I won’t imply that the wealthiest Americans have managed to hide so much of their money, in addition to getting tax cuts, that they aren’t paying their fair share. Who cares - they take private jets, not cars. Why pay if you don’t use it? That also includes Amtrak (which lost a great deal of funding).

Postal Service: You think your ever-rising in cost stamps are paying for the U.S. Postal Service to operate? Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Clause, but no, your pitiful few letters are not enough to fund the USPS. In fact, as more people are using email, text messages, and paying bills online, only the die-hard romantics and collection agencies still send letters. You remember, those sweet love notes telling you to pay the $50,000 you owe for that bypass surgery or we’ll take it all back?

Oh. One more thing. When you pay your health insurance premiums, that money goes into a pool. When somebody has a claim (and it’s paid), the money comes out of that pool. Some of that might even be yours. If you have to file a claim, it too comes from that same pool, even if it isn’t “your” money.

Obama’s plan includes preventative and wellness care and education, something lacking in this country for far too long. If you learn how to take better care of yourself, or catch an issue earlier through testing, don’t you think you’d have a better chance of dodging the bullet? Detect a tiny malignant cancer soon enough, it will never become the size of a basketball. And yes, there are documented cases of tumors that size or larger.

If you don’t care about yourself, what of your family and friends? I won’t ask you to extend your compassion to strangers - what have they done for you lately? I’m sure not even Mother Theresa gave a damn about you when she was alive, and even less so these days. To be honest, she worried about everybody who was suffering. Even you.

I hope I’ve been able to enlighten and entertain as well as educate you. And I hope you will use that muscle between your ears and think before you make a fool of yourself at the next town hall meeting.

Thanks for reading.

Dawn of Darkness

It was 1981. July. The first indications of what was to come began to appear. Eight young gay men had died, all exhibiting signs of having a malignant form of a cancer previously only seen in very old Italian men. The lesions were due to Kaposi Sarcoma. There was also a drastic increase in cases of the rare Pneumocystis carinii pneumonia (PCP) in both California and New York.

This was the dawn of AIDS. But unlike the rising of the sun, this signaled a darkness that still hangs over this nation and the world like a heavy cloak. Death’s black cape.

I remember I was on summer break during High School when the first reports began to trickle in. There was no information, but they were all certain that this was a gay cancer. Nobody else need worry. As a young man still questioning his sexuality - though knowing in my heart the answer full well - this news terrified me. I had no idea that the proverbial shit was about to hit the fan.

The news erupted from every pulpit like a volcano. Ignorance fueled fear, fear begat anger, arrogance begat condemnation and damnation. Anger became hatred became verbal and physical attacks on the entire gay community. Religion had found it's holy sword and would help God wipe every faggot off the face of the earth with glee.

Vesuvius could not have destroyed as many lives as the Christians did. They didn't turn the other cheek - they turned their backs. They did not show the compassion of Christ, they drove us out like lepers on the streets of Nazareth. Not a one called for reason to prevail, or for hearts to open up to those who were suffering.

They made a bad situation much worse.

Gays were hunted down like wolves, blamed for all that was wrong in America. This disease was "God's punishment" for the sins against nature, a statement affirmed by then-President Ronald Reagan. Thank you, Bonzo, for your rational assessment of a health crisis. People were dying and there was celebrations in the churches, pleased with what was happening to the 'homosexuals.'

Even though I didn't yet identify as gay, I saw no rational way that a cancer could target gay men unless being gay was genetic. What an outrageous contradiction for those who believe any disease could attach to a select group to turn around and say gay people "choose" the lifestyle. I knew in my heart that one day the proof would appear. It would begin to show up in the non-gays, too. Then the hate would disappear and compassion would return.

I thought too soon. In 1982, after "gay cancer" and "gay plague" segued to GRID and then AIDS, a classmate of mine came to school wearing a t-shirt dripping with hate. The image burned itself into my memories so deeply that I have forgotten the face of the guy who wore it. Emblazoned on the front was a log reminiscent of the old RAID bug spray. Only it didn't say RAID, it read AIDS. And the catchy slogan was replaced with one far more repulsive: "Kills fags dead!"

I felt like the roaches running away from the can in the commercials. But I couldn't run. I couldn't speak. I just stood there, closing my eyes wishing it would all go away. But while the shirt was gone when I reopened my eyes, the trail of laughter that followed it still rang in my ears. That people found the shirt amusing was as abhorrent as the shirt itself. That the school administrators didn't send the boy home with a suspension or even expulsion is beyond belief.

More people were dying, 'experts' were talking, but still no real facts. The only thing one could be sure of was that nothing was sure. Fear that close contact, drinking from the same glass, kissing - even sitting on a toilet seat or breathing the same air - could pass this disease on to another person continued to rise. People became afraid to touch because they might catch whatever this thing was. And touch is the most important thing to a person who is suffering from an unknown and untreatable ailment.

If the world sat in fear, how much more afraid were those who faced certain death? Or knew they would have to face it alone?

The silence was deafening. The roar of the mob mentality even more so.

Ignorance is Not Justice

When I read the news item below out of Dallas, it made me very angry. How is it that after 27 years of HIV/AIDS, ignorance is still so prevalent? That fear (which is the source of most ignorance) is allowed to drive people to make rash judgments.

Read the article for my factual argument below.

HIV-positive man sentenced 35 years for spitting at officer


Thu May 15, 6:32 AM ET

DALLAS - An HIV-positive man convicted of spitting into the eye and mouth of a Dallas police officer has been sentenced to 35 years in prison.

Because a jury found that Willie Campbell used his saliva as a deadly weapon, the 42-year-old will have to serve half his sentence before becoming eligible for parole. He was sentenced Wednesday.

Campbell was being arrested in May 2006 for public intoxication when he began resisting and kicking inside the patrol car, Dallas police office Dan Waller testified.

Campbell was convicted of harassment of a public servant.


It is a well-known fact that HIV is not transmitted by saliva. Thus, the officer's life or health were never in danger, thus Mr. Campbell's saliva was not "a deadly weapon."

Which body fluids transmit HIV?


These body fluids have been shown to contain high concentrations of HIV:

blood
semen
vaginal fluid
breast milk
other body fluids containing blood

The following are additional body fluids that may transmit the virus that health care workers may come into contact with:
fluid surrounding the brain and the spinal cord
fluid surrounding bone joints
fluid surrounding an unborn baby

HIV has been found in the saliva and tears of some persons living with HIV, but in very low quantities. It is important to understand that finding a small amount of HIV in a body fluid does not necessarily mean that HIV can be transmittedby that body fluid. HIV has not been recovered from the sweat of HIV-infected persons. Contact with saliva, tears, or sweat has never been shown to result in transmission of HIV.


I am going to try and get ACLU and other rights organizations to fight for Mr. Cambpell's sentence to reduced to jail time only for a month or two. Not this fear and ignorance-driven sentence. When people are put in prison for 40 years on murder charges, this is shameful and discriminatory.

I'm ashamed that this happened in my state. Or in my country. Almost three decades after this disease was discovered, and the pandemic of ignorance rages on.