Thursday, January 21, 2010

The Red Masque


"The 'Red Death' had long devastated the country. No pestilence had ever been so fatal, or so hideous. Blood was its Avatar and its seal -- the redness and the horror of blood. There were sharp pains, and sudden dizziness, and then profuse bleeding at the pores, with dissolution. The scarlet stains upon the body and especially upon the face of the victim, were the pest ban which shut him out from the aid and from the sympathy of his fellow-men. And the whole seizure, progress and termination of the disease, were the incidents of half an hour."

So begins Edgar Allan Poe's "The Masque of the Red Death". While not a precise metaphor for AIDS, the similarities are too much to overlook. Blood is the primary carrier of HIV. Red is the color of the awareness ribbon. The early victims of AIDS had lesions on the body and the face, and were wasting away to ghoulish forms. While death was not as quick, the horrors which ultimately led to the fatal end seemed quick and merciless. And, like with the Red Death, those with AIDS were shut out "from the aid and sympathy of his fellow-men."

But the Prince [...] summoned to his presence a thousand hale and light-hearted friends from among the knights and dames of his court, and with these retired to the deep seclusion of one of his castellated abbeys. [...] The courtiers, having entered, brought furnaces and massy hammers and welded the bolts. [...] there was Beauty, there was wine. All these and security were within. Without was the ‘Red Death.’”

That was the other corollary, not commonly known. Groups of gay men in San Francisco, New York City and other metropolitan areas sought to protect themselves from this plague with a pact that they would only have sex with members of their group. Whatever this thing was, they would be safe if they kept to the oath and never strayed.

Yet as with Masque’s Prince Prospero, the folly of this quickly became clear: they had locked themselves in, not knowing the enemy was already amongst them. The idea that it could take years from infection to the first sign of symptoms was yet unknown. And by practicing unprotected sex with multiple partners, and with no treatment, the virus found itself able to mutate and mix with other strains.

This is the superinfection that has been paraded in the news media in recent years, long before such issues were discussed. By passing the virus between so many partners, having it mutate then passed back created a strain that was more deadly than a single infection could become.

To say that Poe was prophetic is a bit much to believe. But one has to wonder at it all. Perhaps Edgar’s drug-induced visions had given him a glimpse at what was, or what would be. Or both.

Yet who could doubt the coincidence held in the chambers of Prince Prospero’s “castellated abbeys”, described by Poe in such intimate detail?

That at the eastern extremity was hung, for example, in blue --and vividly blue were its windows. The second chamber was purple in its ornaments and tapestries, and here the panes were purple. The third was green throughout, and so were the casements. The fourth was furnished and lighted with orange --the fifth with white --the sixth with violet. The seventh apartment was closely shrouded in black velvet tapestries that hung all over the ceiling and down the walls, falling in heavy folds upon a carpet of the same material and hue. But in this chamber only, the color of the windows failed to correspond with the decorations. The panes here were scarlet --a deep blood color.

Other than white, these are the colors of the modern gay pride flag. A black bar is often used to represent those lost to AIDS. A black room hued with the light from the crimson-stained glass. Poe’s Red Death has a corollary with AIDS.

...there were many individuals in the crowd who had found leisure to become aware of the presence of a masked figure which had arrested the attention of no single individual before. And the rumor of this new presence having spread itself whisperingly around, there arose at length from the whole company a buzz, or murmur, expressive of disapprobation and surprise — then, finally, of terror, of horror, and of disgust.

I imagine this is how those revelers of our world, believing themselves to have escaped the plague, must have felt when the first indication of AIDS had revealed itself to them. Whether he appearance of a Kaposi Sarcoma (KS) lesion, as seen on Tom Hank’s character Andrew Beckett’s torso in the 1993 film Philadelphia, or one of their members hospitalized due to pneumocystis carinii pneumonia (PCP), cytomegalovirus (CMV) or progressive multifocal leukoencephalopathy (PML).

It must have seemed to them as though the mummer from Poe’s tale had crashed the party, its attendance noticed too late to escape the horror:

"And now was acknowledged the presence of the Red Death. He had come like a thief in the night. And one by one dropped the revelers in the blood-bedewed halls of their revel, and died each in the despairing posture of his fall. And the life of the ebony clock went out with that of the last of the gay. And the flames of the tripods expired. And Darkness and Decay and the Red Death held illimitable dominion over all."

And so ends Poe’s tale. It is for the reader to decide if the comparisons made are worthy of thought, discussion or consideration. Or perhaps, one should ask Edgar for his opinion...

Friday, January 15, 2010

Life... Don't Talk to ME About Life...

Don't worry. This post isn't really as morose and apathetic as Marvin (see source). I guess because it's been three months since my last post, and we are still waiting for Congress to stop acting like a bunch of moronic infants, the frustration level can make one morose and apathetic. Sad, isn't it, that our pathetic elected officials can cause apathy in the people. Perhaps it's because WE voted for them, and only have ourselves to blame.

So other than still not having a decent national health care plan (which many of our European allies provide), what else has been happening in my life?

I haven't blogged about the PWA Campouts yet, hosted at a private campground run by the Texas Conference of Clubs. The PWA Campout is a bi-annual event for HIV-positive gay men. It's generally a weekend event, but some campers arrive a day or two early to help with any needed repairs or clearing of brush. The fee covers the meals and such for the weekend. If you are low or no-income, the fees are waived. The event is clothing-optional, which makes things interesting at times. Let's just say that both times I've been to the campout I opted.

Campout, May 2009

In May 2009 I went to the campout for the first time. I hadn't been camping in over twenty years. My long term partner, now long-term ex, didn't care for camping so took a valued part of the things I loved away from me for thirteen years. Hadn't found anybody to camp with, so never went on my own.

A friend ("Thumper") offered me a ride since I don't have a car. We went up on Friday to help rake leaves and move some things around. Got our respective tents set up, and went to sleep. Or I thought I'd sleep. Hadn't been camping in over twenty years, but the noises weren't just those natural to the woods. Just when I thought I could finally let the crickets sing me a lullaby, there was the sound of shouting. Yelling. A verbal fight. A loud, painful to hear breakup. It went on for quite some time. Accusations hurled, implied promises broken, blame for doing things they agreed they could do, tears on the part of both parties. Eventually one left, leaving the other to sob and pace in frustration through the dry leaves of the campsite.

When the sun rose, so did I. Decided to see if there was coffee because, despite not getting a restful sleep, I didn't intend to waste the day trying to sleep some more. Since I wasn't pre-registered, I didn't have a name tag. Breakfast was being prepared but not yet ready, so I started talking to another guy who was there. He was trying to get a signal on his cell phone but was having trouble. He told me he was trying to reach his roommate. I told him I didn't have a name tag yet, but my name was Dave. He replied with a sadness in the tone, "that's my ex's name. We broke up last night." I nodded and responded, "You must be Jeff." His face took on a look of shock. "You heard us?" With a laugh I told him, "the whole forest heard you."

He and I started talking some more. We found we had a lot of common interests, and it turned out we both lived in Austin. He was going to call his roommate to come pick him up, since he came with his now-ex and didn't have a place to sleep if he stayed. I suggested he stay with me, and that my friend could take him back to Austin when we left. So, Jeff stayed and we enjoyed the time spent together. Of course, many of the guys were asking us when we were getting married we seemed so close. But admittedly, I wasn't sure it could last. Jeff smoked heavily and drank even more. Not traits that I want in a partner. But we had fun.

I also met Eugene that weekend. He and I talked a few times. Good looking man, funny, intelligent. But I was "with" Jeff and Eugene lived in Houston. End of story, sadly.

The campout ended on Sunday after breakfast, we packed everything up, and Thumper, Jeff and I returned to Austin. A few days after we got back, Jeff and his ex got back together. Apparently didn't last long, but long enough for me to think about whether he was right for me. I knew he wasn't, but no reason we couldn't still be friends.


I'll write about the Fall 2009 Campout in the next installment.

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